Written by Jessica Ardrey
Harry Potter.Doesn’t sound like the name of a hero, does it? Heroes have names like Aragorn, Luke Skywalker and Conan O’Brien.It doesn’t sound like the name of a person who would sword fight a basilisk or battle the Dark Lord. It sounds like the name of a person who wears glasses and lives in a cupboard under the stairs.And yet, that name — that glorious, beautiful name — will remain in the Chambers of Secrets, I mean, of our hearts, forever and ever, amen. It is that name that unifies people all over the world. It is the name of an old friend. It is the name of a conqueror.Come on, the guy’s everywhere. He’s in books, movies, on TV and online. The books have been translated into 67 languages, and, because the French are so impatient, the fifth book became their first English bestseller when fans decided they couldn’t wait for the French publication.Let’s face it: Harry Potter changed our lives. He made reading cool, non-superhero-related capes somewhat acceptable and allowed people to think that maybe magic wasn’t so dorky after all.So I was at the zoo. I wandered into the reptile house to catch a glimpse at some of my more venomous friends (besides those in junior high).There was a trio of guys looking at a giant python, which I’m sure was its scientific name. One of them started making hissing noises at the snake, then shrugged and said, “What, you didn’t know I speak Parseltongue?”One of the friends burst into laughter. The other just stared at him blankly.The pranking Parselmouth looked at the somber friend and said, “Harry Potter?”The unsmiling one continued to stare.The other two rolled their eyes in a who-is-this-guy fashion. The Parselmouth then said, “Seriously, bro. Where’s your culture?”I was awestruck.At one point in time, a literary joke would have meant certain swirly. But now? Now the kid who skipped the books looked like a nerd.The same is true at Hog-, I mean Harding. Most students have read the books and/or seen the movies.It’s a sort of bonding mechanism. All boundaries bite the dust when the topic of HP comes around. We grew up with Harry. We were there when he met Dobby. We were there when Voldemort returned. We laughed with Fred and George. We hated Dolores Umbridge.Harry Potter is the great equalizer. He’s the trump. For example, in one class, the two boys next to me had a drawing contest. They drew opposing sides of a war and I chose the winner.One guy drew helicopters, barbed wire and George Washington. The other’s drawing included catapults, Stonewall Jackson and the Elder Wand. Harry Potter always wins.Similarly, I would like to award 10 points to Gryffindor to the Knights social club for the striking resemblance their symbol bears to the Deathly Hallows.So this is the part where I offer you some advice, you thank me graciously and then reward me with something awesome.Let’s just say you’re a freshman and you’re not quite the social butterfly you expected to be by the end of your first semester. Big pond and all that jazz. Just walk into the Stu, jump up on a table and exclaim, “Expecto Patronum!”If the charm works and you somehow produce a silvery apparition of an animal that most reflects your inner self, you’ll have more friends than Bertie Bott has flavors.If it doesn’t work, well, better luck next semester.You’re welcome for the advice. I will now accept gifts in the form of tickets to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter.
