Written by LaRell Reynolds
Michael Lohan is now ordering his daughter Lindsay Lohan to go to rehab. And might I add, this was done through a press conference. Can we all say, “desperate father seeking media attention?” Please. Michael also said he did not want Lindsay to turn out like Brittany Murphy or DJ AM. If you haven’t picked up on this yet, all these artists died from drug overdose.
On a side note, momma Lohan is not happy that her ex-hubby is holding a press conference for his additional 15 minutes of fame to cap off the hour of attention-grabbing dead-beat parent that Michael allegedly is. Dina Lohan also mentioned that she has a criminal protective order against Michael, and he is one year behind in child support. Michael, you have been called out! How does it feel now that America knows what a pathetic father you are? Dina finished her public statement by saying Lindsay is in good hands and everything is fine. As much as I want to be on Dina’s side, they are both right and both wrong. Lindsay does need help but publicizing family business is a desperate attempt to seek attention. Both parents need to leave Lindsay alone, and Lindsay needs to keep making comedies. Another “Mean Girls” perhaps?
If Sandra Bullock can’t find someone to commit, then there is no hope for anyone. Our Oscar-winning queen is now wondering what she will do with her cheating husband. Shocking, another man cheats on his wife in Hollywood. Is cheating a part of the lifestyle there? Wake up, shower, eat , cheat, go to work, go back to bed? Jesse James, the slime ball who reportedly had at least three mistresses, now checked himself to rehab in an effort to save his marriage to Sandra. Jesse made a public announcement that he had “poor judgment.” Dude, this is Sandra Bullock, “Miss Congeniality.” How can you have poor judgment? But let’s look at these three mistresses. The first mistress, the one I call “the crazy mistress” has pictures of her posing like a Nazi. Great judgment Jesse.
The next mistress looks like a wannabe Pink when she tries to be hard and tough with tattoos covering her arm. The third mistress looks like the tired, worn down Cher look-alike. And out of nowhere and completely unexpectedly, Jesse James’ ex-wife, Janine Lindemulder, wants to be best friends with Sandra. I guess the saying is true: your enemy’s enemy is your best friend. Also, Janine’s daughter says Sandra is the best. Therefore, if Sandra and Jesse split, this new friendship will blossom. I think it’s safe to say that America minus West Coast Choppers, Jesse James’ Company, has Sandra’s back on this messy split.
And we all thought this couple would stay together, yeah right. The couple I am talking about is Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush. Kim is the queen of media attention making Michael Lohan look like a humble civil servant. This reality star moved out of Bush’s pad, estimated to be worth $5.1 million, after rumors of a hookup between her boyfriend and a waitress in Miami. If I were living in a mansion that was estimated over $5 million and my girl cheated on me, she would be on the curb with the quickness.
I am surprised drama queen Kim Kardashian left instead of kicking out Reggie Bush like yesterday’s leftovers. Sources say that the name of the waitress is January Gessert. Any girl whose name is a month that is not April or May is trouble. Clearly January is not the type of girl to have a serious boyfriend, if you catch my drift. She would seem like the type of girl who will hook up with famous NBA stars for publicity. “Eat at ______ for all you can eat, and you can meet employee of the month January, who hooked up with Reggie Bush!” So what does this mean for Kim? Nothing. Maybe she got more fame. Maybe this will appear on her new reality TV show “The Single ladies of Miami, Florida.”
